Retirement Quest

Retirement Quest
Make Better Decisions
John Hauserman, CPF

From the back cover:
Make better decisions...
*Get the unbiased advice you need
*Avoid costly mistakes

Where are you getting your financial advice? How do you know your interests are being safeguarded? How do you know that your advisors are competent? How can you know they're putting our interests first?
John Hauserman has spent years building a better way for you to pursue your investment goals. RetirementQuest: Make Better Decisions shows you how to get unbiased advice and avoid costly financial mistakes.
If you want to build a secure financial future, this is the book that will help show you how.

Ok, my take on the book. I do have to tell you that when you start talking about numbers, and money, and investing or anything else that might have some form of math attached to it my brain freezes and turns to fuzz and I have some form of an anxiety attack.  So I was really excited when I was asked to review this book hoping for a book that made it all easily understandable to me.  I also need to tell you that because of my recent hospital stay, I haven't finished the book.

Now, having said that I will get on with it.

This book has math. Story problems. My biggest fuzz creator.  I read some of it out loud to Jacob.  He said, "How can you not understand that, Mom? I understand it completely." So a junior in high school can understand the message in this book. This is not an in depth, hard to read book.

One thing I really like about this book is that it defines terms used in investing.  There is a chapter that discusses Cash, Bonds, and Stocks.  Who knew that when you are investing cash is not the stuff you put in your wallet and your kids take out for school lunch.  Nope. When investing cash means bank certificates of deposit and other things  like that that are used to save. Who knew?

I also really like that the author repeatedly tells the reader to seek professional advice for help in making decisions so that the reader can make the best decision possible for their life. This is not a one size fits all, but a guide to help make better decisions about your life and your money and your retirement.

Oh, and did I mention that there is an interactive website to help you understand, or figure out things? I didn't?  Well there is.  Go here to check it out.

Now  I am off to finish the book, realize that I have work to do and make some better informed decisions about my future.

John Hauserman, CFP, is the chief executive officer of Retirement Journey, LLC. He overses the details of the RetirementQuest planning experience. Baltimore Magazine named John a five-star wealth manager, based on nine criteria, including customer service, intergrity, knowledge and expertise, communication, value for fee charged, and overall satisfaction.
In 2011 John was named the Baltimore area regional ambassador serving on behalf of the  Certified Financial Planner Board of Standards.


Author's website

Purchase book here

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Life

So life has been interesting the last few weeks. First my laptop died- the motherboard quit working- just as I made the last payment on it.  I had planned on putting that money towards another debt to get it paid off faster, instead it is going toward another computer.  They just kept telling me that the other computer was "3 years old!!"  Shouldn't they last longer than that?

The good news is this computer is awesome- they tell me it has 1/2 a terabyte of ram. I guess.  I am totally clueless when it comes to understanding that so I will take everyone's word for it. And in the data transfer they were able to keep all my bookmarks! and pictures!  Yay.

I didn't get my house as clean as I would have loved to before I had to go in for surgery, but it was good enough.  Sometime I need to stop giving myself ridiculous deadlines for getting things done because it just causes me stress.

So, surgery. Not a fun surgery.  It was a little over 4 hours long and was a major surgery.  I don't remember being in post op and barely remember bits and pieces of the rest of that day. The next day my blood pressure would not stabilize and was too low- 70/50- and my temp was way too high. And I kept passing out. At first they thought I was bleeding internally but I was too coherent. Through more tests they figured out it was just the anesthesia/spinal block they had used during the surgery.  But I really just wanted to be left alone, but you know how hospitals are- the second my eyes closed someone had to take vital, clean the room, scan the equipment, see if I needed anything...

Finally on Wednesday I was able to be weaned off the oxygen, blood pressure cuff, catheter, internal packing out and external dressing off, take a shower and start walking- an adventure in itself.  I could also finally enjoy all the flowers in my room.  All the nurses would come in an comment on how it smelled and looked like a flower store.  But  I loved it. Then I came home Thursday and have done not much but sleep and walk the hall trying to recover quickly because I can't afford to miss anymore work. Though the doctor wants me to take 5 more weeks off.

However I was never able to be taken off the full liquid diet and still today, 9 days post op, am still having a hard time eating anything other than soup because it makes me sick. And today I have a slight fever. I saw the doctor yesterday. He was surprised at how good I look and how well I am doing.  He did write me a note to go back to work next week with very limited activities.

Then yesterday I hear about this. Guess who's son is a manager at the Poppa John's? And guess who's son was working that night? Guess who thought that once this marine came home from Iraq she could stop being paranoid about him being shot?  I'll be glad when he graduates and gets a real job.

I also found out yesterday that my dream job is probably going to be opening up. But the school has an intern this year.  I was the intern last year.  So there will be competion because I am not a perky, flirty with the boys in the office type.  Prayers for that job to become mine would be appreciated.

Progress on the other matter in my personal life, but still prayers needed for that.  Slow and steady to make sure that the correct healing is taking place and not wishful thinking.

Now I am running a bit of a fever and am feeling a bit tired so I am off to pay bills then take a nap.

So continues my year of healing.

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Back up

A few years ago I had my laptop in my bedroom while I worked.  When I was finished and turned it off I had one of the kids take it back to the office to put on my desk.  He turned it loose a little too early and it hit the desk really hard and killed my hard drive.

I learned to get an external hard drive and back everything up.

Which I did.  The last time I did that was in October, though.  And then I took my laptop in to have it's yearly checkup and clean.  I don't think they did everything they were supposed to because it was still giving me the "blue screen of death" every other day or so.  So I was going to take it in this week to have them fix it again because I really want my laptop after surgery.

Yesterday when I got home from work I turned it on to check my mail. 

Nothing.
Nada.
Zippo.
Black screen with just a curser ominously blinking in the corner.

Had the kids' dad look at it.

He thinks my hard drive died.

So, I am typing this at work.
So I won't have a computer over the weekend because the kids' computer screen died on Tuesday.
So I am definately taking mine in today
So I have no idea if they can recover anything (thankfully it is only a couple months worth of stuff and all the pictures are still on my camera disk)
I still have one payment left on this computer and really don't relish the idea of more payments.
Hopefully- if they can't fix this one- they can just sell me a new hard drive and I won't need a whole new computer because remember that whole healing thing? I really want to heal the bank account and this being paid off was going to be the first step on that path.

Is it ok to pray for my hard drive? Because I am.

So I will not have access to a computer all weekend. And that is ok. I don't mind being unplugged from electronics- I have cleaning, organizing, indoor soccer, laundry... but I will miss e-mail.  And hopefully I will be plugged back in soon.

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Lookin' Out My Front Door

I had an idea in November or December. I was going to take a picture each month of the year on the same day to document the changing of the world.  My plan at the time was to do it on the first day of the month.  I think the fact that the first of January was on a Sunday kind of through me off, though because I got sidetracked with church and family stuff.

So I changed my plan to the 15th of the month.  Now to see how well I do with keeping up with this.

So here is the view from my front door today.

I know- January 15 and no snow!! and if you looked close enough you would see that the trees are starting to form little buds-- So not good, people! 

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What I Really, Really Want

Bastian had shown the lion the inscription on the reverse side of the Gem. 'What do you suppose it means?' he asked. '"DO WHAT YOU WISH"' That must mean I can do anything I feel like. Don't yo think so?"

All at once Grograman's face looked alarmingly grave, and his eyes glowe.
 "No," he said in his deep, rumbling voice. "It means that you must do what you really and truly want. And nothing is more difficult."

"What I really and truly want? What do you mean by that?"

"It's your own deepest secret and you yourself don't know it."

"How can I find out?"

"By going the way of your wishes, from one to another, from first to last. It will take you to what you really and truly want."

"That doesn't sound so hard," said Bastian.

"It is the most dangerous of all journeys."

"Why?" Bastian asked. "I'm not afraid."

"That isn't it," Grograman rumbled. "It requires the greatest honesty and vigilance, because there's no other journey on which it's so easy to lose yourself forever."
The Neverending Story
Michael Ende

I had this discussion with my friend the other day, how we as humans, despite all our half hearted efforts, live our lives waiting for something to make our life better.  How we think we will be happy "when _______".  When we graduate, lose that last 10 pounds, get married, have kids, get the job... whatever.

I have come to realize that for a very long time this is what I did, I lived in the future in my head and was frustrated when life didn't mimic fantasy. When my thoughts- spoken or unspoken- didn't automatically come to be, as in the story, always there with no beginning just always existing because I thought it so.

After living last year trying to live with integrity, I can no longer live obliviously like that. No, I am now very much aware when I start trying to wish my life into existence. And despite what Bastian thought it is not easy and it is scary.  And  Grograman  is right, it is very easy to lose one's self if one does not use complete honesty and vigilance.

I have never read The Neverending Story  before and have only seen bits and pieces of the movie. Brandi had the book, read it and hated it and wanted to give it to D.I. but I took it out of the pile and because I wanted to read it at least once.  I am not sure what I think about it, but when I read the above passage the other night, I knew I wanted to make it my own as I go through this year of healing.  Because I am feeling that in order to heal, I need to get real and get honest and figure out what exactly it is that I really and truly want. What my deepest, darkest secret that even I myself don't know yet.

And it is the journey itself to find it that will heal and give me happiness ever after.

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To everything there is a season

Ecclesiastes 3

My sister picks a word to live by and to help guide her life each year.  A fews years ago I adopted that practice for my life.  I had no clue the paths that would take me.  Last year I knew where I wanted to go, who I wanted to be, and how I wanted to get there and it was with that in mind that I chose Living with Integrity as my guide for the year.

I am no where near where I thought I would be today.  In fact I am at a place I would never have dreamed working on things I thought were beyond hope, with understanding far beyond anything I could imagine.  I know that there are those in my life that do not understand where I am, but unless you walked my journey you cannot understand it (I barely understand it).

2011 was a hard, hard year for my family. Our hearts were ripped out, stomped on and ravaged in ways we never believed possible.  We learned to really and truly forgive, we learned about accountability and responsibility, we learned about what love is and what it isn't, we learned about psychological disorders and illness and the differences between those disorders that are choices and those that are not, we learned about acceptance, we learned about prayer and how to truly pray for what you want and not just pray, we learned how to figure out what it is you really want, and we are trying to learn to trust in the Lord.

Someday I'll tell you the story, but right now it is not all my story to tell.

It was with all of that in mind that I began searching for what I wanted 2012 to be, who I want to be, where I want my family to be and who I want it to become.

I picked and discarded at least a dozen words until one day it just came to me: Ecclesiatstes 3, the entire chapter, but verse 3 in particular-  A time to kill, and a time to heal; a time to break down, and a time to build up

This is a year that we, I, need to heal.  There was a time I knew what that meant, but after this last month of prayer and contemplation and cummonion with the Lord, I am not sure I know anymore.  I do know that there are specific areas of my life that need healed:
work, bank account, relationships, my body and health.  And there are ways that I think they should be healed, but I don't believe that any of that will be what really happens. Simply because I know that what I know, and what I can see right now, is not the big picture.  So as I go forward I will try to trust the Lord and do as He asks and directs, but I will keep in mind that when I pray, I am asking Him to help me heal these areas in my life in His way.

Theme for the family to help guide family home evenings this year: we chose Listening to and living by the Spirit

I was talking with the kids' father the other day about the horribleness of 2011.  I told him I was sorry that the biggest thing in our lives happened, but I was happy for one reason, it started us talking and dealing with issues we have been sweeping away for decades and ignoring, hoping they would just go away.  He agreed that that part is a good thing.  Right now we are not sure what we are going to do with those things, but I do know that they are going to be part of the healing of 2012- no matter what path that takes us.

** on another note,  today I was going to post pictures of Brandi's first haircut.  A couple of months ago I turned the caring of her hair over to her. She is 12 now and doing her hair is time consuming and hard and she would balk when I told her it was time to do it.  With me working 2 jobs I no longer have time to fight her over doing her hair.  2 months ago she had a full head of beautiful hair.  Today when we got to the beauty shop and the beautician took the pony tail holders out and I saw what was there, I cried.

Brandi has long hair in the front part of her head, about a 4 inch swath.  She then has 3 pony tail patches in the back and the rest of her head is covered in scalp length baby down hair where it has broken off at the root.  I didn't know because she keeps it pulled back in a pony tail so it covers the missing hair.  She didn't realize it had broken off either. 

The beautician gave us the choice of cutting it all off the same length and starting over or leaving it and wearing it in a pony tail all the time to cover it.  Brandi started crying and asked to leave so we did. She has spent the last 3 hours crying.  So have I.  I know it is because she didn't listen to me about what to do and when to do it, but I can't tell her that right now because it would sound too much like, "I told you so".  If I had chosen, I would have had it all cut to the same length, but this is her hair and has to be her choice, which I am sure she will make in a couple of weeks, but until then, my heart is hurting for my baby.  So much of a woman's identity is in her hair, and when you have black hair, you have so few choices and this is so hard for her.

Let the healing begin.

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Merry Christmas Everyone

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